BREAKING: RASHEED WALLACE RETIRES FROM NBA

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KNICKS WALLACE RETIRES

By Tommy Rothman

Rasheed won the hearts of NBA fans everywhere by playing hard by day and fighting crime by night.

Knicks forward Rasheed Wallace has retired from the NBA for the second time. Generally regarded as the greatest human being of all time, the 4-time All-Star will ride off into the sunset as an NBA champion and the all-time leader in technical fouls. “Sheed” missed most of the 2012-2013 season with a foot injury.

Rasheed has given this team everything he had. He is a winner, true professional and leader on and off the court. Due to his injury, he will not be available to play for us during the playoffs

– Knicks Coach Mike Woodson

Sheed’s retirement opens up a roster spot for the Knicks, who may or may not sign a player for the NBA playoffs.

Quite possibly the greatest thing in the history of mankind

STEVE NOVAK TRICK DUNK VIDEO (Not Safe For Work)

Warning: not for children under 13. Do not watch this video if you are pregnant or may become pregnant. New York Knicks Memes is not responsible for any emotional shock caused by the viewing of this video

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Knicks vs Bobcats Starting Lineup & Pre Game

STARTING LINEUP:

PG Prigioni

SG Shumpert

SF White

PF Novak

C Copeland

Bench: Rasheed Wallace (Active)

Questionable: Jason Kidd (rest),

Doubtful: Raymond Felton (rest)

OUT: JR Smith (rest), Carmelo Anthony (shoulder, rest), Kenyon Martin (Knee), Tyson Chandler (neck), Marcus Camby (Old/Foot), Amar’e Stoudemire (Pretty much everything, probably).

This game means very little, aside from the fact that it could determine Home field advantage in the NBA finals if we play the Nuggets. But that’s not happening, so this game means nothing. As you can see, the rotation will consist of only a handful of players. Nothing to see here. Let’s just see how Rasheed looks, and keep a small amount of momentum. And if we lose, maybe that helps our draft pick a bit, right?